Revive your love life

By By Rebecca Speechley

Marriage and divorce

04 August 2011 10:19

You’ve been married for years – congratulations! But do you ever feel like things are getting a bit stale and staid? If the answer is yes try these five simple ways to inject some new life into your relationship.

Stop snapping

It’s very easy to use your nearest and dearest as a punch bag. Taking your negative feelings out on each other isn’t great for your relationship. If you’re in the habit of snapping at your partner when you’re feeling down, try to talk about it on a day when you’re feeling happier. See if there are any practical things you can do together to manage your moods. Ask him not to say or do certain things that trigger your gumpiness and agree that if you're feeling yourself getting wound up, you’ll walk away and cool down.

Go back in time

If you feel more like friends than lovers these days and you want to get a bit of the romance back it’s time to get courting again. Think about the things you loved to do when you were first together – go to the pictures, have a meal out, take a trip to the seaside. Spend time together away from home, doing something different instead of your same old routine. Make an effort to dress up and woo each other again.

Feel body confident

A lot of women worry about how they look post menopause. And you might worry that your husband doesn’t find you attractive either. Ask your husband what he finds attractive about you. Having something more specific may help you to believe his compliments. Remember, he looks at you in the same way you look at him and sees years of happy marriage, not to mention the woman he fell in love with.

Get out of your rut

If your sex life seems to have run its course take time to discuss it with your partner. It’s important that you both feel happy with the state of your love life. Talk about the ways that you can still be intimate and sensual. You may no longer want full sex, but there are plenty of other things you can do to please you both. Take time to consider each others ideas and find a comfortable middle ground that ensures you’re both happy.

Pay him a compliment

When was the last time you told your husband he looked handsome? If it’s been a while then pay him a compliment today. A compliment is a sincere reflection of how someone else sees you and it will make him feel loved and appreciated – and hopefully he’ll return the favour.